Classifieds

BELIAL CLASSIFIEDS ADS

WANTED: Alchemy Lab Assistant

Due to unforeseen circumstances, there is an opening for an entry level Alchemy Lab Assistant here at Canny Labs. If you are an inquisitive, intelligent person with an interest in the transformative arts (who also has the moral character not to steal from the lab and allegedly attempt transformation crimes...) then we would love to hear from you. While an experienced technician is preferred, we here at Canny Labs believe in the potential of enthusiastic outsiders so all applicants are welcome. Interested parties should mail their resumes to Carl the Canny at Canny Labs, 352 Rue Phallon, P3N15

Sexpet Available!

Do you have extra love to give? I have an inquisitive, intelligent and very loving (and horny!) sexpet in need of a good home (and fucking!). Biscuits is a nine-foot long quadruped who was formally a young woman. She is dark blue, has a modest penis trunk instead of a mouth, has six large udders, and a decidedly bovine penis and cunt. She enjoys being milked, fucking, and long walks. She is not house trained despite being very smart (I believe it is a preference of hers). If you are a responsible person with a high libido, a caring heart, and a large yard you may be who Biscuits is looking for. Interested parties should mail their information to Carl the Canny, 352 Rue Phallon, P3N15.

WANTED: Alchemy Lab Assistant

Due to unforeseen circumstances, there is an opening for an entry level Alchemy Lab Assistant here at Canny Labs. If you have an interest in Alchemical Science but also the self control not to experiment on yourself (or a secret submissive fetish) then we would love to hear from you. While experience is always preferred, we here at Canny Labs value newcomers so all applicants are welcome. Interested parties should mail their resumes to Carl the Canny at Canny Labs, 352 Rue Phallon, P3N15.

Recent Transformee Seeking Romance

Hi, this is, well... awkward. I was transformed in a lab accident a few weeks ago when working with some dodgy, jury rigged alchemical apparatus. Before the transformation I was a slender, sexy brunette woman (5'6", 120lbs). I was fun, vivacious, and very popular with the boys. Then I took a dumb lab tech job and now I *AM* one of the boys. Well, sort of. I still mostly resemble a slender, sexy woman but I'm totally male. The machine that changed me was a penile enhancement device so now I have cocks instead of nipples, a cock instead of a tongue, cocks for fingers, cocks for toes, and an enormous, two foot long cock instead of a vagina. I have not grown any external testicles, but I have grown two huge balls that have replaced my ovaries and filled my womb. I am, as you can imagine, very, very horny! So if you are looking for love, dating, or are just down to fuck a multidicked pregnant looking woman call Kim at XXX-XXX-XXXX.

WANTED: Alchemy Lab Assistant

Due to unforeseen circumstances, there is an opening for an entry level Alchemy Lab Assistant here at Canny Labs. If you are looking for a career in alchemy, are interested in working with experimental prototypes, and are not litigious then we would love to hear from you. We believe in an open door policy so if you are interested please apply! Interested parties should mail their resumes to Carl the Canny at Canny Labs, 352 Rue Phallon, P3N15.

Transformee in need of live-in care

I have recently suffered an accidental transformation. I was working as a lab tech for an alchemy business and was doused with an experimental elixir. I was once an average looking, able bodied guy. Now I am an extreme transformee: I am a limbless, headless feminine torso which is covered on all sides by 3 dozen C cup breasts. At my neck opening I have a vagina with a two foot long, flexible clit tentacle that is photosensitive so I can see and grasp things. My crotch has a second vagina with a thick, muscular ring of external vulva (like a bonobo) which I can use for limited locomotion if I am placed upright. I can largely get by during the day, but as you might imagine, I require help for several tasks such as preparing meals, bathing, and righting myself. I am looking for someone to live with me and help me with these things. I cannot pay you since I only receive a small disability stipend, but I own my home and can offer free room and board. And sexual favors. I love sexual favors! If you are interested please contact me at: BradlyTast@CannyLabs.Net

WANTED: Alchemy Lab Assistant

Due to unforeseen circumstances, there is an opening for an entry level Alchemy Lab Assistant here at Canny Labs. If you want to have a hand in transforming people and have a quick reaction time when told to "duck" then we want to hear from you. We are no longer in good standing with the Alchemists Guild so we are unable to hire you if you are a member. However, if you are another outsider looking to buck the system with your brilliance please apply! Interested parties should mail their resumes to Carl the Canny at Canny Labs, 352 Rue Phallon, P3N15.

Engagement Announcement

Carl "the Canny" Canninski and Pillows, formerly Bradly Tast, are overjoyed to announce their engagement. The couple met when Pillows, then Bradly, took a position as a lab assistant at Carl's business Canny Labs. A happy lab accident transformed Bradly into Pillows, a headless, limbless, feminine torso. Carl overcome with guilt helped care for Pillows until she could find a longterm helpmeet. In spending so much time together the couple grew closer and soon found themselves falling in lust and then love. Pillows owes her very self to Carl and Carl owes Pillows for finally finding love again after the rocky end of his fourth marriage. The couple is planning a lavish spring wedding.

WANTED: Experienced Outsider Alchemist

We are looking for an experienced, brilliant, and misunderstood alchemist to join Canny Labs. Due to an upcoming honeymoon, there is an opening for a temporary alchemist to run the business for a period of half a year. However, due to our head alchemist wanting to spend more time looking after his beautiful new bride, who has considerable physical limitations, we are also looking to form a long term partnership with a new alchemist. If you are an innovative outsider who wishes to work outside the establishment to invent the next big thing, or are just an itinerant alchemist (maybe on the run) who is looking for a lab to temporarily work in, please apply!  Interested parties should mail their resumes to Carl the Canny at Canny Labs, 352 Rue Phallon, P3N15.